recliner somnambulists toward 46

This is one that our Martian received, with our interspersed comments.

ruffian inside pine cone, related to bowling ball, and fundraiser about trombone are what made America great!

Amen! Ruffians, pine cones, trombones, all the ingrediants for a fantastic country! Not democracy or freedom of speech or any of that nonsense!

And assimilate the dark side of her support group.

Wasn't it Chuck Palanuick who wrote about how people can become addicted to support groups?

Irving and I took waif beyond blood clot (with asteroid defined by warranty, beyond onlooker.

Sounds a bit vampiric.

movie theater defined by lunatic is polite.

If a weirdo says it's a cinema, it's a cinema.

Irving, the friend of Irving and hesitates with from lover.

Don't love people called Irving, it's not worth it.

More crap in the mail!

Cunningly disguised in an email entitled 'RE:', this rubbish lurked:

anxious watch terrible mischievous himself cast" experience played scene north besides moved guilty tell hope manners, recognize edge advantage easily horses excitement morning poor became mischievous, mischievous remember thousand recommend surely etc might understand tell, table apologize rose second young whos waited far"

And it continues...

take me down
above telling supper rose special persons need sandwich receive brought, door bear cried drew burst called afternoon pie hold perfect" known heard stand dog fixed master moved?

I have loads of hobbies, what am I doing here?

pork chop philosophers inside 4668

When over minivan is mysterious, briar patch defined by borrow money from of chestnut.Indeed, about widow go deep sea fishing with living with umbrella.Pearlie, although somewhat soothed by sandwich living with prime minister and over fetishist.When tenor toward is stoic, turn signal inside plaintiff sell to living with fire hydrant.When you see bottle of beer related to, it means that waif living with briar patch reads a magazine.Most piroshki believe that from scooby snack avoid contact with bride of hole puncher.
denote carlo woo sold unilateral topocentric hereford

I have family in Hereford, I hope they're alright!

Blah blah blah viagra blah

blab beatify commensurable celeste despise simmons catch controlled flagpole
synonym rumble antisemitic cholesterol dodo ashman worm shea cologne leadsmen
ferry preposition industry skeptic

Do you think someone sits there and writes these? I could do that job, I talk enough shit all day long.

arc dirichlet mahogany allah chrysanthemum chaperone arouse casual elmer cutesy
committal astray polarography disdainful bourgeoisie please compassion till
molest littoral ashland dissuade


These were all in with super-viagra adverts. Why is everyone so hell-bent on enhancing my erection? I feel like my non-existent manhood has been intruded upon.

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commissariat sketchy algorithm evocate zone cardiac buckwheat lobscouse omitting
casanova checkerboard foggy sear autumn architectonic affluent china bowdoin
alphabetic arteriosclerosis slept tomb controller copernicus platoon vogel

heard played them sad also accidentally where chair forty whom? receipt ought still shining even books should few offer. spoke clothes situation giving motor plan occurred girls, possible table nickel led pair town am game direction. here easily she news! dear occurrence means relief season responsible meaning light regular feet" until commit situation servant commit eyes trust circle?

This time they were offering to make my penis 3 times harder. That could be quite difficult.

anything resolved try way? hoping difficult must one sugar strange reason arctic well become, doctor came monday planning instead those height fourth nay. ten sick dead offered stop fixed bicycle year. teacher poem angry disappear cannot thankyou others perform accident. news quick itself blow stairs stop? break dropped themselves field guard, wrong because laughed sudden accommodate died street. alone always continue learn meaning fixed duty never wanted bad? order come where done greatest that actually, which place practically heart opened knowing continued afternoon friends something, past journey together commit ye earth.

commit principle honest servants white! realize here crying go grabbed pattern live" closed meet five whom married future till. ache supposed weird long. could woman satisfied procedure sea no towards. foot answer be continuous stomach conscience definite decided mouth beginning" patient at thing enemy less. sharp fact according mean deceive. arctic consider according turning perform possible sweet" doing evening eat teacher repeated condition. nickel clear climbed paid books likely reference can spite" all disease procedure decision best home bought trees! stories fair grandma cried me twice develop love. letter wine always ache. set talk sad children listened offer paid, returned sad well no fly mentioned open motor early saw! a wait town direction felt but ladies explain"

definite no right object pair others living. came during winter speaking realize coming himself ticket women worse" regular legs dropped interesting was kept so believe! so their subject feeling smooth?

Here's one I found encircling some pirate software. It makes about the same amount of sense when written backwards.

food stamp 2 cigars

He called her Denny (or was it Denny?).Denny, the friend of Denny and hibernates with traffic light inside.Denny, the friend of Denny and goes to sleep with judge around.When demon over procrastinates, of sheriff flies into a rage.Denny and I took related to traffic light (with haunch defined by, behind coward.Most guardian angels believe that about eggplant approach related to tape recorder.
blame ambrosial tear emerson

Is everyone called bloody Denny? This one actually reads a bit like Robert Cormier, very odd.

atavism dey

Atavism, while we're here, is the appearence of ancestral but not parental characteristics, like redheads whose parents have brown hair. It's from the Latin avus, grandfather, or atavus, great-great-great-grandfather.

Where we can secretly share a shower with our cyprus mulch.

Kinky!

When you see turn signal around, it means that cowboy near cleavage ruminates.Where we can ostensibly befriend our clock.

Yes, I need to do that on a regular basis, befriending clocks and whatnot.

phobic salient malnourished dual

Hmm.

You know you're sad when you look forward to junk email

I hadn't checked my email for a few days, and I had 26 junks, and was happy.

Shoot me now.

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Some herbal viagra and,

That's none of my business, growled the kitten


Another Frank Baum quote, this time from Dorothy and the Wizard in Oz. Read it here if you don't want to pay.

Re: Did YOU write this?

Perusing Google, I discovered that that bit stuck on the end of that last message was actually an excerpt from 'The Master Key' by L. Frank Baum, the guy who wrote 'The Wonderful Wizard of Oz'. You can read the whole thing here; tell me what you think!

Did YOU write this?

In truth, so great are its powers that even the dead may be restored to life, provided the blood has not yet chilled In presenting you with this appliance, I feel I am bestowing upon you the greatest blessing and most longed-for boon ever bequeathed of suffering humanityHere he held the slender, dull-colored metallic band toward the boy discontinue Orange stad, and then mail stop 1.200 B, followed by A rub a Keep it, said RobThe Demon started, and gave him an odd look What did you say? he askedI told you to keep it, answered Rob

Methinks someone has jacked someone's fantasy fic. Email me if you know anything about it, or about how dull metallic bands discontinue Orange stads. You never know when you might need to know.

chain saw 7 labyrinths

The babble junkers have returned! I was beginning to miss them!

When ski lodge near power drill panics, umbrella of parking lot ruminates.mastadon related to secretly admire cheese wheel inside.living with squid bounce for widow, because near bottle of beer find subtle faults with near bartender.
bethel retrieval emotion issue lull fullerton bilateral

Hurray!

Ooo hidden messages!

I noticed this once before, so I decided to try it again today: highlight all the text in a junk email and see if there are any hidden messages lurking. Here's the one I found today:

ljj alcibiades: what do you mean, socrates; why do you say so? rqo uzy

Who what? When did the ancient Greek philosophers get involved? So far as I can tell, this is either a line out of Plato's Symposium or his Alcibiades, a dialogue between Socrates and Alcibiades.

Bizarre. And I got another one from the same people with another odd hidden message:

hmm fearing them, feared rather to live in dishonour, and not to avenge his qno tvy

Plato again, this time from Apology. Do we have a bit of a classics buff on our hands?

Ponderous Prefixes and Strange Suffixes

I know why they put those silly lines of babble on the starts and ends of emails, it's to get them through the filters, but I didn't really realise how many of my junk emails had them.

But I did notice that the porno moms don't use them, I don't know whether that's a good thing or not.

time work foreign leader scared war so breakfast food fond, seem deep catch article drew, seemed pride sat man, course own word profession. even got cheat shes, clear hurry minute outside first honest ninety given forget on. thrown waited greatest die anxious medicine circle try.
great able tie hundred meaning their. carried clear chapter pleasant month central! program brown early talked plan" keeping brought afterwards placed finished mountain blow. example glass take really next child feelings played to" opened hundred exaggerate rose stairs water top occasion scene please,

That was on one for vibrators, and this one was on an email for herbal viagra:

depositor offertory perpetual counselor braid bribery pollutant constituent catnip tincture defraud radian flathead buttercup bout dashboard compassionate sinusoidal gaseous odessa

Now there's a phrase: sinusoidal gaseous odessa. Conjures up images of a dead snake being electrocuted. Ahh, the romance!

defined by 8433 but

I've just noticed how much these things read like horoscopes - meaningless drivvle!

widow behind class action suit, living with photon, and of abstraction are what made America great!Letha, the friend of Letha and earns frequent flier miles with dilettante from.He called her Letha (or was it Letha?).
brownian consumptive lennox closeup arsenic

coworker alongside invitation civil

When cough syrup of dies, behind spider goes to sleep.A few brides, and particle accelerator toward) to arrive at a state of scythebodice ripper defined by give lectures on morality to sheriff from.dissidents remain shabby.
augend ardency aggravate barnes durkin lecher transfusable begetting

earthmove acidulous greensward

Apparently I can unleash the power of my digital cable if I click on the advert that came with this one. It sounds a bit painful, though.

of midwife assimilate behind onlooker.Still conquer her from related to hockey player, give secret financial aid to her beyond cup with line dancer related to bartender.He called her Felecia (or was it Felecia?).A few fetishists, and toward bartender) to arrive at a state of submarineMost tenors believe that toward parking lot take a peek at dolphin related to.
arson optima operand mimesis contend region credit

accent bologna bottommost

He called her Mitchell (or was it Mitchell?).Mitchell, although somewhat soothed by toward grand piano and toothpick beyond.Unlike so many debutantes who have made their raspy girl to us.Indeed, philosopher related to anomaly make love to fire hydrant over gonad.Where we can lazily admonish our prime minister.Sometimes class action suit toward squid beams with joy, but related to tuba player always write a love letter to fundraiser behind!
remunerate berry emigrate mills runty tetrahedron demit

Yes, many debutantes have made their raspy girl to me, it happens all the time.

toward 76 and

Recently they've had numbers in the title, do you think they're running out of silly words?

Most alchemists believe that parking lot living with pine cone reach an understanding with living with industrial complex.Matilda and I took around skyscraper (with movie theater for, toward bodice ripper.paycheck defined by pork chop eat marzipan over stalactite, and power drill behind host submarine inside.Matilda and I took light bulb inside (with jersey cow about reactor, grain of sand behind.When eggplant toward ribbon strokes, beyond gonad ruminates.
presbyterian bologna aperiodic slum strident

around 685 and

roller coaster learn a hard lesson from burglar defined by cheese wheel.Any traffic light can pee on food stamp of piroshki, but it takes a real pine cone to bowling ball around.Unlike so many tenors who have made their chic oil filter to us.
fishery darry forbearance albuquerque

What do you reckon a cheese wheel is?

near 596 and

This one came with an advert for '75% off all soft'. Hmm.

fairy near is curmudgeonly.related to globule self-flagellates, but ballerina defined by know piroshki for diskette.A few dissidents, and around gypsy) to arrive at a state of bottle of beerIndeed, paycheck of cream puff host from support group.And confess the dark side of her fetishist.Indeed, tuba player behind go deep sea fishing with blithe spirit over.
resourceful regress costume tess orchestrate

near 80 or

For example, marzipan toward umbrella indicates that roller coaster living with polar bear plan an escape from defined by somnambulist. Yeah, and pine cones expanding indicates that rain is coming. When you see midwife defined by coward, it means that spider about haunch feels nagging remorse.taxidermist a change of heart about turkey of bottle of beer.Unlike so many philosophers who have made their psychotic demon to us.But they need to remember how barely alchemist near rejoices.When demon about reads a magazine, chess board living with necromancer daydreams.
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afterlife listen tonsillitis

Still dance with her from cashier for mortician, tr to seduce her avocado pit about with paper napkin living with.Fern, the friend of Fern and rejoices with around plaintiff.defined by razor blade feels nagging remorse, because power drill around bicep sell to buzzard about skyscraper.widow pour freezing cold water on pickup truck over.
armco danubian lad acidic

demurrer retaliatory coupon

I told you the wedding dress was possessed, it woke up!

ribbons remain wobbly.over wedding dress wakes up, and bonbon about haunch meditates; however, snow beyond admonish..He called her Dylan (or was it Dylan?).Still fall in love with her from submarine behind fire hydrant, sell to her toothpick inside with lover defined by.hole puncher from meditates, and wedding dress around goes to sleep; however, about abstraction prefer..But they need to remember how overwhelmingly related to cab driver meditates.
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pocket dahlias beyond 100

Dahlias are brightly coloured flowers, named after Swedish botonist Dahl. In case you were wondering.

If impresario inside bur avocado pit beyond, then living with steam engine hibernates.Still bur her from bubble about sheriff, mourn her near support group with toward piroshki.dissident over, living with tripod, and near light bulb are what made America great!Indeed, briar patch of bestow great honor upon roller coaster over scooby snack.When maestro of tea party reads a magazine, related to minivan feels nagging remorse.
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blithe spirit 89 waifs

If you say that Ben Franklin said it first, people think it's profound.

Most ribbons believe that living with sandwich play pinochle with living with girl scout.ocean living with ballerina is makeshift.Rosanne, the friend of Rosanne and returns home with over jersey cow.burglar tr to seduce about tuba player.
capacitate reindeer whittier blvd anywhere stenography frigidaire

freight train 1 debutantes

A sentence-by-sentence interpretaion:

If rattlesnake from mourn customer defined by tomato, then of nation laughs out loud.

Rattlesnakes don't like having tomatos thrown at them, they'll bite you, making people will laugh at you.

Now and then, pit viper living with buzzard a big fan of bodice ripper inside football team.

Possibly something to do with bukaki.

And share a shower with the dark side of her cloud formation.

She sweats so much that clouds of sweat form over her and rain on other people.

And host the dark side of her wedding dress.

Her wedding dress is possessed and expects you to feed it.

But they need to remember how accidentally boy beyond trembles.

It's cold, so don't blame him if he shivers.

bilk quillwort takeover choirmaster

Drugs are bad.

louver handymen erode fetus

And make love to the dark side of her snow.Molly, although somewhat soothed by defendant behind and swamp toward freight train.When toward snow is nuclear, taxidermist from philosopher bestow great honor upon hand behind.Any light bulb can make a truce with living with ski lodge, but it takes a real onlooker to power drill of.customer behind cup is precise.A few pockets, and gonad toward) to arrive at a state of looking glass
placental seduce clan compression message buckaroo harlem painstaking

It reads like a dodgy Chinese translation of walkman instructions.

somnambulist 7 bonbons

Somnambulist means 'pertaining to dreams', in case you were wondering.

When you see over coward, it means that for corporation leaves.When minivan living with scythe is optimal, food stamp beyond bestow great honor upon scooby snack near.tripod from fruit cake ceases to exist, because blood clot for apartment building go deep sea fishing with for mirror.When beyond dolphin is paternal, vacuum cleaner toward pocket a big fan of salad dressing defined by.Unlike so many girls who have made their greasy looking glass to us.
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Ah yes, groin psychiatry, that well-respected profession...

multi cordon bagley

Do you think this would help or hinder the campaign for the legalisation of cannabis?

When you see piroshki defined by lunatic, it means that living with particle accelerator goes to sleep.Colin, the friend of Colin and ruminates with blithe spirit of movie theater.If cloud formation beyond judge throw at light bulb near, then living with waif prays.Still ignore her from for football team, steal pencils from her necromancer about with taxidermist behind steam engine.fruit cake living with roller coaster fall in love with bullfrog around, but lover related to dance with about burglar.Where we can single-handledly throw at our burglar.
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infield plenipotentiary path

He called her Gretchen (or was it Gretchen?).Furthermore, fire hydrant toward minivan flies into a rage, and diskette inside share a shower with tuba player beyond boy.for abstraction derive perverse satisfaction from graduated cylinder living with cough syrup.Unlike so many biceps who have made their most difficult turkey to us.
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I'm quite intruiged by the idea of a minivan flying into a rage, that's gotta be something to see.

pine cone 35 somnambulists

Now and then, bubble bath over labyrinth make a truce with boy related to hydrogen atom.Still trade baseball cards with her from coward near, figure out her for ski lodge with over tape recorder.ribbons remain gingerly.
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Must be American, we don't bother with baseball over here. It's just fancy rounders.

about 15 and

When you see grain of sand living with, it means that for chain saw daydreams.Any movie theater can befriend short order cook over, but it takes a real particle accelerator to senator inside.Indeed, toward umbrella graduate from living with dolphin.A few pockets, and girl scout related to midwife) to arrive at a state of fruit cake
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Do you think if you read every tenth word or something, it has a meaning? Maybe every 50th...

from 790 but

I'm not the only one! Here's some verbal dribblings that our kid Martian got sent:

for microscope is ghastly.Billy and I took omphalos about (with near industrial complex, stovepipe near grizzly bear.For example, ski lodge of indicates that jersey cow for confess corporation toward.

Short, but no less stupid.

dahlia labyrinths near 7

Most cream puffs believe that earring defined by rattlesnake host hockey player over diskette.
Sometimes around sheriff gets stinking drunk, but tenor toward submarine always plan an escape from prime minister related to movie theater!
diskette behind make love to near grain of sand.
When espadrille inside lunatic is imaginative, tomato about caricature girl scout around scooby snack.
necromancer near is salty.spider negotiate a prenuptial agreement with razor blade from diskette.
crosswise spectroscopy morn vivacious edematous bart

awful chippendale

Sometimes power drill toward leaves, but from cab driver always write a love letter to taxidermist of!wheelbarrow around prays, but bonbon living with seek from warranty.Any hand can seek maestro near asteroid, but it takes a real dolphin to for bicep.But they need to remember how amorously photon from traffic light gets stinking drunk.ski lodge living with somnambulist returns home, and mastadon living with fruit cake goes to sleep; however, clodhopper near chain saw assimilate..
grommet esplanade mandatory poetic salesian runic

Not those cab drivers again!

By the way, the titles of the posts are what the emails were entitled.

prentice snail willoughby

And sanitize the dark side of her onlooker.
And learn a hard lesson from the dark side of her skyscraper.
When burglar around is so-called, toward fetishist admonish from globule.
of vacuum cleaner befriend grizzly bear from necromancer, and inside cab driver eat coward near waif.
trouble intestate retribution comb pullman consulate

What? Cab drivers eating cowards? I worry about these junkers, they talk like they're on acid.

Where it all began...

So I was at college checking my emails, when I came across this in my inbox. Entitled 'joust razor', I was a wee bit puzzled. It didn't sound like herbal viagra, and it didn't look like naked women, so I opened it up to find out more. And so it all began...

Any particle accelerator can fall in love with hole puncher beyond warranty, but it takes a real apartment building to tomato around tomato.
For example, from dissident indicates that paycheck of know behind short order cook.
Now and then, bonbon toward ribbon mourn tomato of.
Kelly and I took wheelbarrow behind cough syrup (with living with paycheck, debutante defined by.
parking lot toward, over alchemist, and toward graduated cylinder are what made America great!
detach apposition roam castigate darwinian detente

Is it coded? Is it profound? Or is it just a pile of shit? I think the latter, personally, but never mind!

Hi kiddies!

Hello my darlings!

How are you all? Good? That's good. I'm not too bad myself, thanks. Bit tired, and it's quite warm today, and they're forecasting thunder. But enough about that!

Recently I've been getting some damn odd junk emails. Not the usual penis enlargements or XXX moms, but something a bit more... random. I've read a lot of stuff from random sentence generators, but they don't really read like any I've seen, but wherever they come from and however they were made, they make opening my junk emails a bit more fun.

Enjoy!